Sunday, August 7, 2011

Life with Twins and a Tot

Life with my kids is, well, amazing!  I'm so in love with them.  Aidan is so big, and getting to be such a good boy.  He still has his moments where I wonder why I even bother to speak, because he doesn't listen, but those are getting fewer and further between. 

He loves to "help."  And I let him.  Even though his "help" usually ends up making tasks take much longer, he feels so useful, and is so proud of himself.  He loves to take a wet rag and "teen" everything he can reach.  The bigscreen, the walls, the furniture, the sinks, the bathtub,  the exersaucer.  All with the same rag.  Which means, he goes to sleep, and I go back over everything and re"teen" it.  But I brag on him, tell him what a big boy he's getting to be. 

He's so crazy over the babies.  This is bad, but I have to be honest.  I believe Rebekah is his favorite.  He always goes to her.  Always.  They can both be laying on the floor together, and most times, he totally ignores Gracie and goes right to "Webetty."  And, yes, we've all taken to calling her Webetty, thanks to him. The only time I notice him paying any attention to Gracie at all, is when Rebekah is asleep.  I'm not real sure why, Gracie is the more giggly, vocal one of the two.  But, Rebekah has hair on the back of her head that is so long it touches her shoulders.  Aidan loves to rub hair between his thumb and first two fingers.  He does it so very lightly, that I don't even feel it when he does it to me.  He's always rubbing the babies' (usually Bekah's) hair.   Gracie has a lot of hair in the back, too, but it's nowhere near as long.  I think that's why, but I may never know for sure.  I just hope that the favoritism isn't as strong when they get a little older!!!

Gracie has rubbed a bald spot on the back of her head, from all the rolling and moving she does.  Aidan noticed it one day and asked, "What's that, Mommy?"  Well, I couldn't resist.  I told him, "You've rubbed all the hair right off of her!!"  He looked at her, looked at me, looked back at her with a puzzled look on his face.  All of a sudden, he grinned and said, "Well.  It's TUTE!!!"    Of course I cracked up.  He's so funny.  He's so special.

We attract attention everywhere we go.  Everybody loves babies.  Everybody loves twins twice as much.  Everybody has a twin story.  They are a twin, their dad was a twin, their neighbor had twins, they always wanted twins.  I love those people.  Then there are the "poor you" people.  Those are the ones that make me want to never expose my babies to the world.

We've had several people (men) stop my husband and say things like, "Dude, I'm sorry"   Or, "Bro, that must suck."  and things like that.  That's very offensive.  Or the ones that look at us and shudder and say, "Better you than me."    Really?  You're sorry? I have three healthy kids and you're sorry?  For what?  Let me tell you something you can be sorry for.  We watched our second baby die.  He was born so sick he couldn't survive.  I was holding him in my arms, I felt him take his last breath.  THERE'S something to be sorry for.  My healthy, living babies?  That's NOTHING for you to be sorry for.  And it doesn't suck. It's amazing.  It's hard work, the hardest I've ever done,  but it's worth every second.  And it IS better me than you, I wanted these babies, I pray and worry every second of every day over these babies.  I'm GLAD they're mine.  I'm thrilled to have twins and a three year old.  I'd give my own life if I had a two year old in the mix, too. 

We get no middle of the road reactions.  It's either the twin story people or the poor you's.  But, we also get a LOT of questions.  I surely don't mind questions at all.  I'd rather people ask than to make assumptions about us, but answering the same series of questions no less than five times, every time we go to the grocery story, becomes repetitive. 

"Are they twins?"  (they're always dressed alike, they're pretty much the same size, both in bucket carsesats)  "Nope, they're just good friends" *wink, wink*
"Are they boys? one of each? girls?"   My babies are very obviously girls.  I never, ever take them out without either pink clothes or a big Josie Duggar headband/bow on their heads.  Or a dress.  I dress my girls like girls.  People look at them, help themselves to move the PINK blanket, and ask if they're boys. 
"Are they identical or fraternal?"   That's actually a decent question for MY twins,  because they look a lot alike.  But, they're fraternal.  I have a friend who has a set of twin girls, about six months older than mine.  Her babies are as different as night and day, and people still ask her that.  Really?

The answer of "Fraternal" leads to "Did you take fertility drugs?"  Nope.  But thanks for asking. 

And Aidan just gets skipped right over, more likely than not.  Every once in a while someone will ask him how he likes his sisters. He just smiles and says "Two babies!"  He's such a good big brother.  I sometimes wonder what kind of brother he would have been to Landon.  I really think a great one.  I really do.  He's so kind, and loving and sweet.  And affectionate.  He loves people so much.  All people.  He has done so well with the babies.  I was a little worried, he had been the absolute center of our world every minute of his life, and now he has to share the limelight. But, the center of our world got bigger, instead of taking part of his share. 

We take our kids everywhere we go.  I very rarely go anywhere without at least one, but usually all, of my children.

My heart is so full of love for them, and for their daddy.  He's such a good man, fantastic provider, my best friend.  I'm a lucky, lucky woman.

1 comment:

  1. I don't think people ever have a clue unless they know someone that has lost a child like we have...I get "hurt" all the time with comments about how many kids I have and how hard that must be and all I can think of is that it should be much harder with ONE more that's in Heaven. Your son sounds like such a great little guy, reminds me of my oldest who was always so eager to "help" me :)